The Day My Father Died
It was a Sunday morning, forty-three years ago this week. As the sun rose over the Western Pennsylvania town where he grew up and raised his family, my father’s battle with cancer came to an end and he was raised to new life in the Risen Christ.
Dad was only 59. It seemed older to me then than it does now! He grew up on a little farm where my grandparents somehow raised six children in a four room house. Their first-born, Harold, died as an infant in the flu epidemic of 1918, a consequence of what was supposed to be “the war to end all wars.” The uncle for whom I am named, evidently the “joy bringer” in a family that bears a genetic seriousness, died in WWII. My grandmother died with a heart attack shortly after they received word that his plane had been shot down over Holland.
But the family went on. I can remember when my grandfather married the wonderful woman whom became the grandmother we knew and loved. She lived to be 100.
Dad dreamed of going to college, but instead he and his three brothers went to war. Like the rest of “the greatest generation,” he came back and went to work, raised a family, and built an auto parts business out of nothing. The store burned down the summer before my twin brother and I went to college, but he rebuilt it and went on. It still goes on today with a different name.
Dad had many strong opinions – a genetic flaw that runs rampant in the DNA of our family — but his life was built on a few unshakable commitments to his family, his business and his faith. Everyone who knew Ves (short for Sylvester), knew that he was a Christian, a Methodist, and a teetotaler in that order.
He’d go to the store on Sunday to get a part a mechanic at the local service station (that’s what we called gas stations when they actually provided service), but only after he went to Sunday School and worship. He was the guy people called on to give a prayer before dinners because they knew he knew how to pray. When he died, we heard stories he never told from people he had helped when they were down and out across the years.
The Family Goes On
My father lived long enough to see his three sons graduate from college and start their careers. He loved the women Jack and I married and adored the four grandchildren who arrived before he died. His love reaches beyond the grave to his third daughter-in-law, fifth grandchild, and the eight great-grandchildren who are heirs to a fortune not of wealth but of love, loyalty and faith. His great-granddaughter was confirmed in the Lutheran Church last Sunday.
Dad’s witness goes on in the words that are carved into his gravestone: “I commend my Jesus to you.” The words appear on a statue of Charles Wesley in Bristol, England. Dad probably picked them up from E. Stanley Jones.
This week I will remember the day my father died. But I will remember even more clearly the way he lived and pray that we will continue to live that way. The family, and the faith, go on.
Keeping on keeping on!
Jim
Jim Harnish 
Jim Thanks! I hope you and Martha are doing well. Life here continues and I keep feeling better and hoping to get stronger. Jane and I am going to the FSC Day at Tropicana Field with some college buddies next Sunday afternoon. I do not plan to assume the designated driver role I performed in college. Have a great week and I wish you both the VERY best. SHALOM, Tom Mc
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Loved reading about your dad. Thanks for sharing. Sandy
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You write so well and really should pen your life story! Beautiful words about your dad. Hard to believe he’s been gone 43 years!
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What a wonderful set of memories and gratefulness, written beautifully. Thank you Jim!
I always enjoy hearing from you.I still miss you at Hyde Park sue lyon
Such a nice tribute to your dad, Jim. I enjoyed reading it.
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We are blessed by good fathers for generations yet to come. It is the best inheritance. Thanks for sharing.
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Jim,
Great article about your dad.
Thanks for sharing
Gary
Jim: Thank You for sharing about your awesome Father in your wonderful tribute to him. I have a feeling he and Jesus are smiling down on you today! You always leave me grateful for the gift of your writing, and the reminder of how blessed we all are through our faithful Savior.
I got a good cry out of this one. We were blessed with a dynamic family and Uncle Ves was one of the best. Such a good person. Well said, Jim ❤
Jim, My father died on Sunday, August 13th, 50 years ago at the age of 54. I let his premature death color my life more than I knew. Thank you for the moving tribute to your and Jack’s dad. It reminded me to keep remembering his life and the man I adored, rather than the loss. John Park is my husband and we both so enjoy and appreciate your writings. Madeline Kingston-Park
Thanks, Jim. asalways, a great story.
Jim, What a beautiful recounting of those who went before you and those who are with you now. You remain a “missed man” in Tampa, particularly on Monday mornings. I’d like to get your blogs sent to a new email, but I can’t see how to make the change. If that’s something you can do, could you send future blogs to cdreinermd@gmail.com? I hope all is well with you and Martha. Chris
Jim, it always amazes me how often your words come in such a timely manner..despite time and distance. Just two weeks ago my mom passed at 94 yrs. Larry, Jane and I saw her a few hrs before to discuss with the docs hospice care. Just 3hrs later and she was gone as my niece sat with her. I was so glad dhe wasn’t alone. Her body had just had enough as she had pneumonia, a collapsed lung, infections in her stomach and leg, and could not swallow or speak. We had a simple grave side service as she was cremated ( she didn’t want to be buried in a box ) and wanted no service. We tried to honor her wishes as much as we could with some scripture, prayer and anyone who wanted to could share a remembrance. Short but I don’t think she would have objected too much. We had to have something – as you know the service is for the living. Her children, grandchildren, and some great-grands where there to say goodbye. Of course it was sad but she lived a long life and was ready to go. I wish she had the same deep assurance of faith your father did but at least the sparks grew in most of us. The family, and the faith go on. Keep on keeping on. Sue
Jim, you were truly Blessed. Not all of us had that kind of family and have spent a lifetime trying to move past our relationship with our father. Only my faith has allowed me to live this long with my past. I know you do, but thank God every day for your family and especially your relationship with your Father.
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